…or so he was told by the hospital. I first found the article this morning on Perez Hilton but you can also find the news article on Yahoo News. When I first read this article I thought it would either turn out to be some sort of joke or a serious case (i.e. pregnant man). It is kind of a mix of both. It happened in Curry General Hospital in Portland, Oreland on Friday September 26. A 71 year old man - a grandfather - went to the hopital due to some abdominal pain and upon his release he was given some pain killers along with his discharge papers. What did his discharge papers say? The line read as follows: “Based on your visit today, we know you are pregnant”.

O.O

I can imagine the reaction he must have went through in that first minute after reading the paper [ - I thought I was a man! - ]. Haha. But in all seriousness how can this happen?! I mean I understand it being a mis-stroke on the keyboard and making a mistake, but the thing that bothers me is the fact admins don’t check the printed document BEFORE giving it to the patient. You read this article and can’t help but start laughing at the stupidness of it all but at the same time you have to think of the possibles this could have had.  

Called you for the first time yesterday
Finally found the missing part of me
Felt so close but you were far away
Left me without anything to say

Now I’m speechless
Over the edge and just breathless
I never thought that I’d catch this
Love bug again
Hopeless head over heels in the moment
I never thought that I’d get hit
With this love bug again

I can’t get your smile out of my mind
I think bout your eyes all the time
Beautiful but you don’t even try
Modesty is just so hard to find

Now I’m speechless
Over the edge and just breathless
I never thought that I’d catch this
Love bug again
Hopeless, head over heels in the moment
I never thought that I’d get hit
With this love bug again

Kissed her for the first time yesterday
Everything I wished that it would be
Suddenly I forgot how to speak
Hopeless, breathless, baby can’t you see

Now I’m…
(Guitar solo!)

Yahow!!!

Now I’m speechless!
Over the edge and just breathless!
I never thought that I’d catch this!
Love bug again!
Now I’m hopeless, head over heels in the moment!
I never thought that I’d get hit!
With this love bug again!
Ohh oho

Love bug again

this poem is dedicated to a boy…a very special (and I use that word loosely) boy that if he reads this than he’ll know its for him.

–

how can I say this delicately?

the fact is you kind of stink.

not to mention you have buck teeth.

i am sorry to say that there is just no way.

i am not getting you laid.

i know I said I was being delicate.

but this is as nice as it can get..

your feet are big and your back is hairy.

the mole on your cheek is kind of scary.

you’re be offended when I say this.

but you look like the creature from stargate 7.

when you get mad I want you to remember…

through this all I was being delicate.

–

I’m just kidding. This poem isn’t about anyone I know haha but this is what happens when I’m bored.

Boys are dumb. Just like in general. They treat you like a queen when they are try to convince you to fuck them and then when you refuse (or give in) it’s like they turn into freaking ice. Maybe I am talking to the wrong types of guys. I don’t know. I just am not attractived to any guy right now - they are all such big turn offs.

But my dream boy…like wow. I literally do mean a dream boy too. It was from the dream last night. In my dream I was in a highschool class room and something happened [like a shooting I think] and everything was chaos. Then this girl [in reality she’s a girl from middle school that I havent seen in years] comes up to me and tells me I need to go to the hospital because dream boy [I don’t remember if she used a name for him] has been hurt and he says he wants to see me. So then BAM! I’m at the hospital and in the waiting room. He comes out in clutches and tells me he has to tell me something. 

I follow him to this bench where he takes out pieces of torn paper and reads me this poem [the only part I remember is ‘i even have your face on my lighter’ to which he hands me his lighter and sure enough my pic is on it]. It’s really weird because I’m sure I have never met this guy. He was tall 5′9 maybe, had long black hair that reached his shoulders but it was tied in a ponytail in my dream, he was tan but pale with grey/hazel eyes. Oh and he had a British accent! He could skateboard and he could play the guitar. Anyway after he read the poem I was speechless and he grinned, cupped my face in his hands, and leaned in to kiss me. It was crazy how I could really feel the kiss. It wasn’t like sexual or anything but had alot of passion. The impact of the kiss was so strong I jumped out of bed and that ended my dream. It sucked that I couldn’t jump back into the dream and I probably won’t dream anything like that again - at least not with that impact. But of course it would rock if I could find this dream boy out there somewhere. *sigh* Oh well.

I saw your picture today.
It was awful in a cute type of way.
I think I fell in love today.
It still feels weird to say
I almost died today.
It was nothing but a fluke mistake.
I want to kiss you today.
It is just in case I don’t have another day.