In the poem, The Workbox by Thomas Hardy, the author is delivering a message with the undertone of intense irony to his wife. The tone of voice is in poetry, as in any other form of writing, is something very important because it lets the reader know the situation through feeling. The use of setting the voice in a poem makes the writing a lot more entertaining and allows for the words to flow better into the mind of the reader. Right from the first paragraph of this poem, the sense of irony is jumping off the pages. The whole point in the workbox is to make the wife feel as insignificant as she thinks he is. After all, the wife believes he knows nothing of her knowing of this John character, but the narrator obviously does and perhaps is even jealous of their prior relationship. In a way he is trying to coax her into some sort of unspoken confession:

“But why do you look so white, my dear,; And turn aside your face?; You knew not that good lad, I fear,; Though he came from your native place?” (Hardy)

However after the act of presenting the box to his wife, he did not foresee her entire reaction. While he only expected her to be shocked with his work and perhaps sort of outcome with saddens – there was another emotion showing through.

“Yet still her lips were limp and wan,; Her face still held aside,; As if she had known not only John,; But known of what he died. (Hardy)

This line again provides a visual with the tone it is being said and now adds mystery to the overlaying sense of irony.

From the various poems assigned this week in class, the personal favorite of mine had to be The Workbox without any doubt. As a reader I look forward to poems with underlying messages. In this poem I find all the elements that make for an interesting piece of writing: irony, mystery, and morbid humor. I enjoyed the fact the man decides to come directly forward with his wife but instead “plays with her mind”. This action of course back fires in a sense because he did not expect to find out what he did through her reaction – which she had perhaps, had something to do with the death of John. Overall this poem makes for a good reading, as do many other poems written by Hardy, and definitely has that entertaining factor that makes it memorable for readers.

On a personal side, for me the American Dream is to be able to own a home. I believe this dream is not my own and is in fact shared by hundreds of people. The dream of being able to own a home means much more than some might think. Owning a home is more than having a piece of land. After all so many people come to this country, risking their lives, for their dream that it cannot be just summed up as a mere material possession. Being able to own a home is like being able to say you are liberated. By owning a home a person no longer feels trapped – not that renting is a bad thing – a person can feel at ease because it is something that is theirs. I think that’s the bases of this dream of owning a home: the person being able to claim something that is theirs for all to see. Owning a home is not an easy task and by owning a home that person can have something to show off all their hard work.

Some people in my life claim I will never own a home because it is impossible for me to do so – because it requires so much money. These comments just make me want to strive harder in school and get a good job to prove all those people wrong. So another way to look at it is, by owning a home that person is proving people wrong and showing them that they are their own boss. This is where I believe ties to both Biff and Willy Loman in Death of a Salesman. Both characters to me struggle trying to prove themselves to other people – to live up to expectations. When in fact what both characters are truly wanting is to be their own person, hence the American dream. Not having anyone to have to respond to, being their own bosses in control of what they want to do is what both of them wanted all along. And it wasn’t until they realized that in fact they controlled their own destinies that they were able truly understand what the American dream really was.

Should I? Or should I not kill myself. That is the question. A fairly simple question. Which would be nobler of a man? To stay as he is and let his mind slowly die. To make his mind drift to insanity from his own mental torture. Or to rather take matters into his own hands and end his own torture. Let it go and let it come to a complete finish. It would surely be easier to give up instead of opposing them. To put an end to all this and to sleep. To die. To sleep eternally. And with this sleep would come the peace of mind I so seek. In this sleep nothing can be felt. No heartache or pain. Sleep will consume so wholeheartedly that feeling could possibly be felt. To sleep is to deeply wish to be eaten away by such consummation. Perhaps in this sleep a man will be able to dream. But that cannot be. For if this man has taken his own life what kind of dream can he have. There is no dream for the dead. For the dead have given up. Beyond death there is nothing that awaits us. Instead of being dead one must take a pause. A pause in time – in life so that one may think over actions and rash decisions. Now it is understood what makes me think the way I do. Conscience. The conscience that lets man become a coward afraid of living just one more day. It makes us resign on living and makes us sick from our own thoughts. And so men lose their good name to their conscience and throw their life away.

Every year resolutions are made; most of them are to simply lose weight. As simple as it may be, it’s a resolution that can be broken in just one week into the New Year. Losing that extra amount of weight is not as difficult as it appears to be. Anybody can lose the amount of weight desired by just figuring out what one’s body can and cannot do. It is important to want to look better but losing weight can also help one be a lot healthier. Within the time limit of a month one will be able to look into the mirror and be satisfied with the better view. To get the better view one must not give up so easily; as said by the famous self-help guru Jack Canfield, “There are lots of people in the diet realm who will cheat or fall off the wagon. The trick is to get back on…” (qtd. in Droze).

Being on a diet is a long hard road that may make one want to give up numerous times. A trick so that one does not give up is getting the right motivation, which can be something even more difficult. There are a lot of right and wrong motivations; a wrong motivation would be to do it for someone else. Wanting to be on a diet, and wanting to lost weight should only be about oneself. What happens when that person that motivated one to lose weight is not there for some reason? It is possible to gain that weight and even more weight back because one doesn’t have that reason to please another person any more. A good example of motivation is going to the store and buying an outfit that one would wish they could fit into. Don’t over do it either and buy an outfit ten sizes smaller; about three sizes less should be fine and reasonable.

Before going on a diet one must know how much weight is needed to be lost, and in how much time. It is important to pace oneself and not over do it because then you could end up having serious health problems. A good idea would be to make a chart or an outline of how much weight is needed to be lost with the amount of time. For example, one could say that during week one through week three a certain amount needs to be lost, so and so forth, until the ultimate deadline. Make sure that the amount of weight and the amount of time are reasonable; losing fifty pounds in a single month is defiantly not reasonable. In the same sense one will also be keeping a food journal. After every meal write down what’s been eaten and the estimated calories intake. One will start to see what foods could be taken out of the diet and replaced with healthier ones. If one is having trouble deciding what amount of weight is healthy to be lost then seeking professional help is the best option. You can go to a personal trainer, dietitian, or a nutritionist because they “…function as you weight baby-sitter” (Casey).

Now having thought everything through, one must contact one’s regular physician. It is important for a doctor to know that one is going on a diet, and needs to know how much weight one is planning to lose. He or she can best answer any health concerns, especially if one has any medical issues such as diabetes. A doctor can also let one know if the amount of weight desired to be lost is medically okay, or if there are things one should or should not eat.

What a person eats affects a person’s weight a lot more then some may think. There is no way around the fruits or vegetables, nor the meat and milk. Ever heard of a balanced diet? Try having all the different food groups in the diet, but it doesn’t have to be in equal amounts. Enjoy the diet; don’t make it a torture having to eat, as said by Catherine Fitzgerald,  Director of Health Promotion at the University of Michigan Health System, “…rather than cutting out entire food groups, add something good to your diet, something you enjoy eating” (qtd. in Casey).

Food isn’t the only thing that has an impact on a diet; exercise is also a major factor. Enrolling into a gym is one option or one can simply exercise at home. Aerobic exercises like running, walking, and swimming are good for losing weight. But doing some pushups and sit-ups can help a lot as well. Purchasing some free hand weights can help you build muscle mass, which burns more calories than fat. As stated by Kiku Trentlyon, a sports trainer for the New York Sports Club, “Women should not be afraid to lift weights…women’s muscle become stronger and more toned [unlike men who will develop huge bulging muscles]” (Casey). Like mentioned before enrolling in a gym is just an option, many people do not have the time to join a gym. Keep in mind that just as long as one is working out for fifthteen minutes a day it is still exercise. One should not strain themselves doing an hour workout when one’s body can only go for about thirty minutes. Day by day work up to a longer workout; too much too soon could be dangerous. Adding more days to a workout, as one grows stronger is good but at first start off by exercising about two to three days per week. If one has any difficulties it is crucial to contact a physician.

Being thin is a lot of hard work but in the end one will be pleased with the results. One always goes into a diet hoping for a better view of themselves, which does not always happen. Motivation is the key, get the right motivation and everything else should fall right into place. Eating the right food, drinking plenty of water, and exercising will help anyone reach the weight goal desired.

Works Citied

• Casey, John. “Starting a Successful Diet.” MedicineNet. 10 May 2005. 15 Jan. 2006 <http://medicinenet.com>. 
• “Diet Soda vs Water for a Workout.” Go Ask Alice! 27 Sept. 1996. 20 Jan. 2006 <http://goaskalice.columbia.edu>. 
• Droze, Kim. “The 7 Steps To Dieting Success.” EDiets. 15 Jan. 2006 <http://ediets.com>. 
• Mercola, Joseph, and Rachael Droege. “Trans-Fat: What Exactly is it, and Why is it so Dangerous?” 23 Jan. 2006 <http://www.mercola.com>. 

Psychotherapy techniques have made a large difference in the lives of many people who suffer from some type of mental disability. Among the many psychotherapy techniques are two in specific, humanistic and behavior therapy, which individually can be extremely effect in aiding someone with a mental illness. Humanistic and behavior therapy are much preferred among a variety of therapists. These two therapy techniques are similar when it comes to developing a person’s internal strengths and wills. Therapists using these techniques put their focus on what their clients are feeling as of right now rather than focusing on traumas in their past. However neither therapist that is applying these techniques denotes the fact that past experiences may be influencing current behavior. The main focus of both humanistic and behavior is to make the client expand the way the think of themselves and the actions they think they have to make. In other words these therapies help their client start anew with him or herself – reshaping their current train of thought.

But just how these techniques are similar they also have a variety of differences. Behavior therapy teaches obviously how to change one’s behavior and not their actually personality. In contrast, humanistic therapy teaches a person to do more self-exploration and as such changes the way they perceive themselves. Behavior therapy is more of a hand on approach when compared to humanistic therapy. Modeling, a part of behavior therapy is just how it is named. In basic terms it requires the client to copy a person’s behavior and use a model as reinforcement for his or her own future behavior. This is one of the reasons that behavior therapy is perceived far less effective then humanistic therapy. It really lacks breaking through a person’s inner conflict and instead essentially teaches people to copy behavior. Just copying behavior or forcing oneself to learn new behavior does not erase the actual problem this person is having. Humanistic therapy, in contrast, is much more talking than actual doing like behavior therapy is. It tends to focus more on clients subjective and conscious experiences. With humanistic, a person builds a relationship with their therapist and as such develops more confidence. This type of therapy focuses more on emotions and feelings for oneself as well as the feelings and thoughts of those around the client.

Both techniques have their strengths and depending on a person’s mental state determines which one should be applied. Behavior therapy is great and excels in terms of helping a client overcome things such as phobias. Since it is a hand on approach type of therapy, it is better suited for those clients looking for quick therapeutic program. Humanistic is stronger when dealing with a client’s feelings and is overly person centered. The major strength that humanistic therapy has is that it connects with the client and as such makes the client more subjective to feelings they would otherwise shun.

What is love? According to the American Heritage dictionary love is a “deep emotion and warm feeling for another” (“Love”). But by connotations love is almost limitless. The definition for love leaves space for numerous types of love. There is puppy love, platonic, romantic, and sexual love, just to name a few. There is also the question, is it love or infatuation? Knowing what love is can be simpler than trying to tell, “…the difference between love and infatuation can be rather confusing” (“What is Love?”).

Infatuation is an extravagant passion or admiration for a person that is greatly confused with love. When a person is infatuated they will experience some things that they would not feel if they were actually in love. For example a person may start to have “feelings of panic, uncertainty, overpowering lust, feverish excitement, impatience, and/or jealously” (Hautman). The only way to know for sure if what one is feeling is infatuation or love is by being patient and giving it time.

Love is an affection that makes a person start to care for another. When you feel love the experience “…will propel you into another dimension, another reality” (Hill). It’s a feeling from the deepest reaches of the soul, and from the vastest expressions of the heart. It symbolizes unselfishness, willingness, devotion, and understanding. It’s trusting someone and questioning them before believing lies from others. Love is the most thoughtful and most understanding feeling of all, because it involves an undying trust in someone. It means thinking about someone all day and not being able to take them off ones mind. Sometimes love can be one sided; other times it is a friendship. When one is in love, one starts doing things for the other person. When being in love one just wants the other person to notice them with the same fondness.

In a sense one does anything for love but does not mean it is love. As said by marriage and family therapist Wendy Hill, “Love asks that you give up judgment, fear, resentment, shame, hurt, and expectation of love returned”. Love is pure and honest not ever jealous or selfish. When in love one never hurts, but always understands and forgives. Love is not a trend or a disease; it is a four-letter word that brings happiness and pain. This feeling of love cannot be expressed in destructive ways. One can only show love by giving “your attention, your time, your focus to someone” (“What is Love?”). In many forms and types love is just an emotion that can happen to anyone at any age.

Occurring at a very young age puppy love is a wonderful thing. Puppy love is when an adolescent starts liking someone. Puppy love can be a wonderful brand new experience to someone, but unfortunately not long lasting. It’s an infatuation that starts off strong, but gradually fades. This is when one first feels shy around the opposite sex. One starts to have an increased heartbeat and sweaty palms around that certain person. When an adolescent has a crush or is in ‘love’ they will only see the good things in that person. Like most infatuations it is merely a physical attraction and it can be quite painful if one is rejected.

A platonic love is “a pure, spiritual affection, subsisting between persons of opposite sex” (“Platonic love”). Friendships can also be called platonic love because they are a non-physical and non-sexual relationship. Friendship is the comfort of feeling safe with a person and being able to share everything with them. In a friendship or platonic love there is honesty, trust, and sharing. The two people in this type of relationship must be able to trust each other to the fullest. There is a mutual respect to one another and loyalty involved. True friendships or platonic love is the highest form of human relationships. From a platonic love many other types of love can be born.

In platonic love there is an ability to talk about anything with a sense on relaxation. Both of the people involved are perfectly natural and act normally. When in a platonic relationship one loves emotionally and supportive, no matter what happens. When one is really committed to this type of love one does not “…gossip…[one] see[s] gossip as undesirable and destructive” (Hill). A platonic love can happen at any time in someone’s life and one can have more than one.

What is romantic love? A romantic love is “…one where you have a deep feeling of connection to the other person” (Hautman). Romantic love became a recognized passion in the Middle Ages, when in some cases overwhelming barriers of morality separated lovers. In more modern times romantic love has been the theme of art and entertainment in all its forms. Some of the greatest poetry, opera, and literature have romantic love as the main theme.

In a romantic relationship, one wants to be with the other person all the time and do all things together. In a basic sense one’s world revolves around the other. In this relationship both partners accept each other for who they are and both appreciate the other. Unlike platonic love, romantic love involves “a mix of emotional and sexual desire” (“Romantic love”). Just like other types of love, romantic love can be returned or unrequited. One of the ways you desire to express your love for them through your sexuality. Romantic love can generate many powerful feelings. It can provide a profound ecstasy, and a deep suffering when frustrated. To some people romantic love is irrational; to others it’s an emotional storm.

When involved in a romantic relationship both the partners need to be committed to each other. Romantic love is the foundation of most marriages, “without the attachment of romantic love, we would live in an entirely different society…that…[resembles]…circles in the animal world” (Obringer). It is also romantic love that makes one stay in a marriage, especially after children are born.

There is also sexual love, which is mostly physical rather than emotional. In a sexual relationship there is of course arousal, lust, and lots of touching. This type of relationship is not long lasting since the couple is close while having sex, but not afterwards. Sexual love is dependent on lust while romantic love is dependent on emotions. According to Sexologist John Money, “Love exists above the belt, lust below. Love is lyrical. Lust is lewd” (Obringer). While being in a sexual relationship one is only seen as an object to the other. One’s sexual desire needs to be met, if not then one moves on to another partner. If one has a strong sexual love for a long period of time it may be that one is also developing a romantic love.

What love is depends on the type of love one is feeling; such as puppy love, platonic, romantic, and sexual. Infatuation and love are greatly confused, but with time one is able to tell what one is actually feeling. Love is more then one simple definition and it can be many types.

work citied

• Hautman, Jennifer. “Is What I’m Feeling Infatuation or Love?” Self Creation. 15 Feb. 2006 .
• Hill, Wendy. “Love: The Joy and the Sacrifice.” How to Have A Better Life and Better Relationships. 15 Feb. 2006.
• “Love.” Def. 1. The American Heritage. 3rd ed. 1994.
• Obringer, Lee Ann. “How Love Works.” Howstuffworks. 14 Feb. 2006 .
• “Platonic love.” Web Knowledge Online. 15 Feb. 2006 .
• “Romantic love.” Wikipedia. 15 Feb. 2006 .
• “What is Love?” Love Sessions. 15 Feb. 2006 .