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Cheap Dweeb

August 9

When did it happen? How is it that I didn’t notice before this? When did I become bargain hunting, coupon using, W.O.W. playing dweeb with a tingle of cheap?! Not that I’m complaining… I am saving money and am now a part of the arguably largest MMO EVER!!!! …okay so maybe this is putting a bit of salt in my cupcake. It doesn’t bother me, it’s just that it makes me feel lame. A bit of a contradiction, I suppose. But there is no escaping the fact that I absolutely love playing W.O.W. No matter how tired I feel, I know I have to put an hour or two of my time daily into the game.

And… well… about being cheap… when did I become the person who buys the store brand soda as opposed to Pepsi just because it saves me 75 cents. When did I become my parents?

I suppose in the long run these things really don’t bother me at all. A lot of people do both these things and there is nothing wrong with them, so why should there be anything wrong with me. World of Warcraft gives me a hobby and bargain hunting saves me a buck or two. Only alternative is to embrace these things with open arms and just give it up. Be proud of whom I am.

A video game loving penny in a jar for a rainy day saver…. It kind of has a nice ring to it =)

Barnes and Nobles Plus Birthday

August 2

It was my birthday on Thursday (23, now) and it was without a doubt the best birthday ever! It also marked my first birthday with Adam which was pretty sweet. Got some awesome gifts (will post pictures later). Had awesome cake. Oh and also had a nervous breakdown. I have impeccable timing for this stuff, don’t I? Ha. I always like to think my birthday really is when marks a new year for me (as opposed to Jan. 1) and it’s the time to make resolutions for myself. Last year my resolutions were pretty much accomplished so I was looking forward to making my list again this year.. and then it hit me… I have no goals for life. All I want to do is sit on my fat ass and play WOW. That’s it. Que the nervous breakdown here. Lucky for me, I had Adam at my side when I started going into cardiac arrest freaking out. I think what it boiled down to was the fact that I hate my life. Like REALLY hate my life. But the worst part is I can fully admit that I don’t have it bad. I have it pretty good actually. Somehow that makes it kind of worse.

But enough with the melodramatics please!

I have tons to sort out in my head for the next few days. Life style changes for sure. But all of them for a better – happier – me in the future.

Besides all that blah blah blah, I went to Brunswick Square Mall (I think that’s what it’s called) off of rt 18 this weekend. Had a giftcard from Barnes and Nobles so I thought I’d use it right away for some manga of course. When I went to check out with Adam on my right and books in hand, I had the utmost pleasure to see my dream guy at the cashier. He was it. That punk emo rocker dude with the piercings, heavy jewelry, and fucking awesome hair that I can only manage to snag in dreams. Of course I told Adam how I felt and teased him all weekend with the ‘BNN Guy’. All in good fun. That is something that I love about my relationship with Adam. While he may get jealous that I go gaga over other guys sometimes, he doesn’t flip his shit because he knows that I love him. I mean sure BNN Guy was hot but I would never wanna get to know him. I’m not interested in that. I just love eye-candy!

Communication

July 28

A relationship without communication simply cannot work and I’m glad to be able to say my relationship doesn’t fall into that scenario. Yesterday I gave Adam a call and we talked… well… he listened while I cried. I did let him know how I felt about the whole him not texting me and feeling overall like I’m annoying him. He told me to ‘Stop BabeLMAO! But seriously I felt better after expressing my view and him telling me what he was or wasn’t thinking. Everything is more or less is worked out, I suppose. For now anyway. Having had that conversation with him though eased my mind and my heart. It also made me realize I was in fact being a tad bit too emotional and was over-reacting. At the end of the day, he is just a man and as a man he can be dense as a rock so I have to make sure to tell him what is bothering me or else how will he know to stop or change what it is he is doing.

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